To Change or not to Change – Two Heads

I still did not know whether or not to use a pseudonym for the crime novels.  Up until now I had written Regency Paranormal, oh, and science fiction.   But now I included crime.  What would my readers think, how would they react?

So, after much debate, chewing nails, clenching teeth, I decided to let things run.  It wasn’t a question of taking the easy way out. I think I have chosen the hardest.  I realize I have a mercurial mind, some might say butterfly. I would say it is both butterfly and dragon.  The analogy being, I love to write gut wrenching crime and frothy Regency with an underlying message. Way below the sex and the foam is a plea for the subjugation of women.

Then crime is a passion I cannot resist, A new idea for a plot swims through a nightmare, makes a thunderous announcement, with my innards and heart.  Responding, I lurch up in bed, beads of sweat running down my bosom, my lungs gasping for air.  Yes – Yes, that’s it. Eureka. The ideas for a new crime of passion or dreams of a psychopath are born.  I must admit to looking furtively into the corners of blackness, did something, or some serial killer lurk in the shadows?  My bedroom is indeed black I use black out blinds. I profess to being a partial insomniac, so I try to block out all light. Anything that would alert my teeming brain.

I never dream the plot or idea for the Regency novels, they just arise in my mind as I walk the dog in brilliant sunshine. Obviously, atmospherics play a part in inspiration.

My conundrum was could I expect my readers to appreciate both Regency and Crime?  Yes, they are different novels written at different times but there is only one author – moi. Yes, my two heads. One is invisible. Doesn’t frighten the hairdresser. Would my Regency followers grimace to see a crime book advertised at the same time as a sexy romance? Would my crime readers think I write more romance than crime in the novel?  The answer is no – no.  In the crime book, the romance would be gut wrenching sex.  Not porn or even erotic, just sex.  Regency is far more about the seduction of the hapless heroine. Actually my heroines are never hapless they are vixens. Cats clothed in satin.

As the summer drew to a close, I knew I had to put the novels on. By now I had written three, one regency and two crime. My very first crime novels and I loved every blood filled moment of writing them. Well most of the time. I must say here and  now, that I felt guilty writing some of the crimes, in fact so much so, that I stopped typing and grabbing  Lily’s lead, went off for walks down the Twittens ( old roads) my head filled with questions, should I  include that spine chilling crime?  Is it too gory?  Why was I writing it? I even put the wasps out with a glass and paper so as not to hurt their fragile legs. So why was I writing it? Well there was a reason, an historical one. People love historical novels, and accept the gore, the guts, and the spilled innards. But put it in a fiction crime novel and bodies flinch, heads shake and voices groan.

So September rolled on and still couldn’t make up my mind if I should use another pen name for the crime novels.

In the end I decided, writing is all about freedom, the freedom to write what we will. James Joyce shook a whole nation with his Ulysses; DHJ Lawrence did likewise with Lady Chatterley’s lover. Thomas Harris enthralled the world with Hannibal Lector and his penchant for cooked brains.  I researched and saw many writers did write in different genres but kept their name. And that is what I must do. I must trust myself, be brave, and be myself with all my sub-personalities on show. A true writer writes from the soul, with their fear and their love.  So they cannot claim any pseudo dignity. They have to show their true self, their own dignity.

So after much sighing, I accepted freedom.   We may have genres; they are okay for selling purposes, or making choice of book easier, but not for a writer’s soul.

Today, I’ve faced the situation and put on my first Regency novel, which will be followed up with the two crime novels.  The photos of each are now on my two blogs.  And I must say I felt a sense of satisfaction, a love for my muse, wherever and whoever that might be.

A Lady’s Plight is out today, and the images of the two crimes are there.  But I won’t start advertising the two crime novels until after A Lady’s Plight. The reason being, my ‘Look inside for Death Chords’ is not yet on the Amazon page.

Such a flurry of words. I find I have quite another sub-personality for writing the blogs, it’s a particular voice I can hear, a particular feeling.  So different from the Regency sub-personality and far away from the crime sub. Yes, I do have sub-personalities and I acknowledge them. One day we may all join and be one ‘whole’ balanced, and calm.  What a pity.